You’re All Going Forward, I’m Stuck In Reverse

The ‘next gen’ has become the ‘current gen’ and the majority of my friends are happily playing on their Playstation 4 or Xbox One. Although I’m saving up for a PS4, it’ll be a while until buying one becomes reality. Thankfully the lack of many enticing games saves me from selling my kidneys on the Deep Web out of desperation.

In a move that has surprised myself though, I *am* currently playing on a new console and thoroughly enjoying myself. For my daughter’s twelfth birthday we picked her up a Nintendo Wii. They’re dirt cheap nowadays and both of my kids are at an age where they still have the energy and inclination to prance around the room, clutching a controller to play virtual tennis or bowling. I assumed it would be set up in her bedroom, purely for them to use with friends but it’s yet to leave my lounge as I’ve been relishing my time on it far more than expected. I downloaded Super Mario Bros 3 and had a fun evening being beamed straight back into my youth. I still made the same mistakes that I made when I was ten and was amazed at how some kind of ancient muscle memory kicked in. I can’t remember what food I bought from Tesco the day before but can recall which pipes to duck into and the right moments to leap past enemies. I imagine that’s how I’ll constantly feel when I’m eighty and in a nursing home.

I immediately gained an appetite for Mario and scoured a local shopping centre until I could find a copy of New Super Mario Brothers and have been playing it for the past few days. I say ‘playing’, it’s mostly been fits of moderate to severe anger, wails of frustration and at one point calling Mario a “LITTLE ITALIAN BASTARD”. This is why I don’t play Dark Souls. My daughter had to be roped in to help me complete a castle level and did it “first time Mum, AND I was only little Mario”, which I will never hear the end of. My pleas of how “my reaction times are slower” and that “I’m still getting used to the controller” were ineffectual.

I’ve browsed other popular Wii games but can rule a lot out. I’m lazy. I don’t want to be standing up or swinging an imaginary golf club. I want to park my backside on the sofa with a bag of cheesy poofs and controller in hand. I’ve ordered Little Kings Story to try and will keep my eye out for any other recommendations. Even with its fuzzy standard definition and uncomfortable Wii remote, I’m still quite excited by a selection of games that I’ve never played before and it’s killing time nicely until I can join the masses now living in the next generation.

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